Take Time to Think

A few weeks ago I told you about a meaningful thought I had while I was alone for a few hours and out of cell range. The interesting thing about it is that, even though I had nothing else to do but walk and think, at first my thoughts were haphazard and pointless. But at some point, I decided to be more introspective and force myself to deliberately choose what to think about.

I’m a bit embarrassed that it took me so long to do something so important. All I had to do was take time and be purposeful.

The internet, smartphones, and social media have brought tremendous wealth and ease to millions but at the same time have made us dumber and less emotionally healthy. I’d make a case that these things have also been the impetus to what’s currently pulling the fabric of Western society apart.

How has it done this? Well, that probably has a complicated answer, but I’d argue that none of those technologies would be effective if they hadn’t done one thing: cure boredom.

We hate boredom! If we’re not used to it, it’s painful. But when we’re used to being bored and we take the time to deal with the most important thoughts in our lives, boredom can become something we look forward to.

When I was on my mission I carried no technology with me. I had no distractions except for the Bible and the Mormon scriptures, and my companion. And for one hour each day, I was required to do silent, personal, prayerful study. This was deep thinking! I learned to love it so much that I was almost always sad when it had to end. (This was partly because I’m a major introvert and I dreaded having to talk to strangers all day.) I longed for the day when I could be home from my mission and think, study, and pray as long as I wanted.

I don’t do this near enough anymore. I find that I avoid important things that I should be thinking about and dealing with. You can see this same thing on the show Alone. Have you ever noticed how uncomfortable some of the contestants are to be alone with their thoughts? They have nothing to distract them so all of the things that they should have thought about years before crop up and torment them.

Other contestants don’t seem surprised or bothered by their thoughts—probably because they’re used to dealing with them. They’re not surprised by what they say to themselves.

My generation is the last to grow up without the boredom-killing technologies. We’re the last group who will remember what it was like without podcasts, YouTube, news websites, Instagram, Facebook, music apps, dating apps, etc. etc. We were creative. We read books. We went outside and caused a little havoc. We rode bikes. We made traps and lame weapons. We went on hikes and caught lizards. We doorbell-ditched. Yes, we watched TV but after a few hours it turned into infomercials, so we went outside.

None of the technologies that consume our attention today is inherently bad, but the impact on most of our lives is net negative. This means that while there might be positive for each of those apps, our lives would be better if we deleted most of them and never touched them again. Even if we don’t consume anything harmful, the fact that they kill boredom and place thoughts in our heads is bad enough. Sometimes having a thought placed in your head can be good—prompting you to think about things that you wouldn’t otherwise—but how often does this happen? And are you really thinking or just killing time? Are your thoughts really your thoughts? Are you sure? Most people today are so afraid to be alone with their thoughts that they can’t drive, sit at a red light, be on the toilet, or on a walk without being captured by their devices either through their eyes or ears.

Think of how your thoughts have been influenced! Think of what you’re missing! Think of what you could accomplish if you directed your own thoughts.

Taking time to disconnect and think is the first step but it isn’t enough. You also have to be deliberate: think about what you’re thinking about and choose the most important topics:

• What matters most in your life?
• What is the purpose and meaning of life?
• Does God exist?
• Where are my strengths?
• Where are my weaknesses?
• How can I get better?
• Where should I aim to be in the next 5 years? 10 years?
• How can I be a better friend?
• How can I prepare to be the best spouse?
• How can I fulfill my purpose and calling?

Increase the amount of time that you have alone with your thoughts. Here are a few ideas from my own life and my own observations:

• Leave your phone in your bedroom.
• Don’t pick it up in the morning.
• Don’t listen to anything in your car sometimes.
• Don’t pick it up when you’re bored.
• Don’t take it to the bathroom.
• Take time to think about the most important things. Write them down and take action on them.
• Read a good book.